I was that girl who enjoyed anti-children events. In-fact, I was the girl asking “Why would you bring your kids here?” So many times I heard “You won’t understand until you have kids.” But, I thought I did. I had Kylee Pup, my pooch and she was most definitely as close to a child as any dog can get, so I thought.
Well, I am here to tell you, times have changed. ‘Turns out I had NO IDEA about having a child. The word life-changer is an understatement. To a non-parent these words life-changer does not truly sink in but it will if ever you have your own. It sure did for me! I am a different person now and in charge of another human being. This tiny, fast-growing miracle has overtaken my family time and laid to rest my relationships with my childless friends.(And I miss them!) Somewhere between nursing constantly, chasing my toddler around seemingly endless hours a day, cooking, cleaning, mommy and me classes, I have almost stopped caring about what’s on Facebook and where happy hour will land me. Maybe it’s just I’m too tired to care. Who knows?
This mom thing is way harder than expected. The truth is there is nothing that could have set me up for success. This is something that had to be experienced to understand. I had several couples, moms and family members try to break it down for me and I never truly understood until now. If you are a mother-to-be, although you are carrying a child inside you, do not understand yet. You just don’t. If you do not have kids, understanding is not a part of the cards. If you are a mother of a child. Bless your heart. You get it!
So today, I write on behalf of all the mothers out there who have received grief from childless folks. The childless people will apologize in the future while looking for your tips and tricks. Forgive them now for they know not what they do. Remember when you were once childless and so cut them a little slack. They’re overwhelming responsibility will most likely one day be theirs too. Allow the childless folks to remember your kind heart. Respond to them with compassion and leave them excited about their single days that you so long to have from time to time. Forgive them when they give you the stank-eye because they are contemplating taking their child to Vegas and for-sure bring them to holiday parties.
When your child will not sit in the highchair in the restaurant and those single gals are staring at you. Walk over and ask if they wouldn’t mind watching your little one while you go to the bathroom… (Okay, so I’m just joking but it would be funny.) For now those single gals will not understand why you sit around for 2 days in your pajamas. Just wait for their child to have those lovely melt-down days where sitting them down for just a second is not an option.
Oh, and, please forgive them for not inviting you places because you do not “party” like you used to or they are in fear you will say no. One day they to will understand the importance and invite you no matter the outcome. We must all remember there are different seasons in life and we all hit them at different times. Just because you may not be in that season does not mean it will not come. Keep your heart and mind open and show compassion. Life is so short and we need those close to us to share the special moments with.
And, thank you to my friends. I love you and so miss you. I think of you often and look forward to a time we will get together.
But, for now, I’ve got to go kiss my boy.
Katie Girl
